Note to self

I've definitely sunk into a funk here the past few days.  I can't really put my finger on why, but every day has been permeated with a desire to sequester myself away from everyone. Of course that's not an option, as work still needs to get done and the kids need their father. Even my favorite pastime of gaming hasn't brought much pleasure. The Christmas season always seems to bring me down for some indefinable reason and Thanksgiving isn't really much better. The two holidays where everyone is supposed to come together in love and kindness makes me just want to be alone. And for some reason the news of my childhood friend's impending marriage seemed to sadden me as well. That makes NO sense to me whatsoever. He's been married before and that didn't go well. He's found someone now who I've only met once, but they are apparently happy together. I should be happy for him, and I do wish them the very best. Am I jealous? I don't think so, I've given up on marriage. I tried it once, it ended and I'm much much better off. I came close to proposing twice since then, and it fell through both times. That was enough for me. I'm very close to someone now whom I love very much, but neither of us have a desire to get married or even live together. That's not for everyone, but it seems to be working for us.

I'll get through the holidays like I always do, and give my children the best time that I can. And perhaps I'll find the cash to get myself a little something as well.

Suck it up, buttercup. There's more important shit going on than wallowing in self pity.

My personal top 13 horror films

These are not in any rock solid order (except for the first and second spots), and I make NO claims as far as good taste goes.

13. Slither
12. The Exorcist
11. Night of the Living Dead
10. Nightmare on Elm Street
  9. Paranormal Activity
  8. Drag Me to Hell
  7. Evil Dead
  6. Poltergeist
  5. Alien
  4. Event Horizon
  3. The Ring
  2. The Grudge
  1. The Shining